First Dates With People Who’ve Already Seen Me Naked
A case for sharing your sexual preferences—and your nudes—with a potential new partner
I’ve been on several first dates with people who’ve already seen me butt-naked. Some of these have, in fact, not even seen my face — only my body.
The reason is that I occasionally meet people, both for friendship and dating, through the kink and fetish social-network Fetlife. I say that this is a place where up is down and down is up, for a few reasons.
First, the pictures people post of themselves here are vastly different from what you see on any social or dating platform: In this corner of the webosphere you’ll find headless bodies engaging in any (un)thinkable act, but their faces, as well as their real names, are rarely revealed.
Apart from this, Fetlifers don’t usually share what we do for a living on the site. The type of music, literature, and movies we like, our political beliefs, or other factoids about our personal lives are left for later.
In this place where up is down and vice versa, we start by sharing our roles and leanings in the bedroom, a list of our kinks and fetishes, as well as our soft and hard limits (aka, what we’re on the fence about and what we’d definitely never want to do). Most…
