Post-Divorce and Desiring Casual Sex, I Still Wanted the “Boyfriend Experience”
Even if I didn’t want a commitment, I was still looking for romance.
Back when I first left my ex-husband, I went on a sexual journey to reclaim myself. I wanted to fuck my way through my city, if you will. Why did I want this?
Was it revenge? I can understand why anyone would think that. I was coming out of a ten-year-long marriage where my husband had cheated on me with multiple women.
A psychologist might say I was also fearful of commitment. I was too afraid of getting hurt again to make myself vulnerable with any new man.
But that wasn’t the case. Sure, my ex-husband had hurt me but I wasn’t trying to get back at him. I wasn’t afraid to give my heart to somebody new. I just wasn’t ready.
That and I was sincerely horny. I wanted a lot of sex, period. My marriage had been almost sexless. I wanted to make up for lost time.
I was also depressed, so maybe I was chasing the dopamine rush of the chase and the endorphin high of the sexual experience.
And let’s face it — I was forty. I was in my sexual prime.
So I embarked on a post-divorce sexual journey. But to say I only wanted to fuck…
