Apr 9, 2020
Three Cool Vibrators for Quarantine
Like my friend Michelle Obama, I firmly believe that a girl’s education is extremely important. Which is why I’ve busy doing some investigative research so I can educate all my ladies, about the best vibrators to use during the quarantine.
Gone are the days where your only options were the Magic Wand or the Rabbit. Today’s vibrators are far more advanced reaching your naughty bits in ways never imagined. And with nothing or no one to do in between zoom meetings, you may find yourself with an itch to scratch. Here’s my list of 3 vibes for couples and solos.
FOR COUPLES:
Orlupo Remote Control Vibrator
Couples vibrators generally suck if you ask me. Except for one.
While We-Vibe might be the granddaddy of couples’ sex toys leading the way since Laura Ingalls got in her covered wagon, Orlupo has taken it to the next level.
This C-shaped (or “U” depending on how you look at it) is meant to be worn with one end inserted inside to stimulate the G-spot and the other side resting on your gummy bear (as Tommy Lee likes to call the clitoris) while you’re doing the horizontal mambo. Since Orlupo is completely flexible you can adjust it to your body so it aligns up with all your bits and pieces.
At first, it was kind of odd; but once I got used to it, it was most definitely enjoyable. It’s the kind of toy you use when you want to take it nice and slow; like an R & B song. I know sorry, you’ll have to save the death metal for next time.
FOR SOLO OR COUPLE TIME:
SVAKOM G Spot Vibrator
Have you heard that Eddie Money song “Two Tickets to Paradise”? Well, this vibrator offers 8 seconds to paradise (aka orgasm) and I think that’s a vast improvement. Additionally, it’s quiet and promises to be a lifelong partner. Single ladies, take note.
Can we say party?!! The Svakom knows how to get the job done. If you’re not into g-spots, fret not. This vibrator can work on pretty much anything. Boobies, for example. Svakom is cute. It looks a bit like Dino from “The Flintstones”, is waterproof and has 25 different speeds. Talk about versatile.
I decided to increase the vibrations slowly. Well, let’s just say Svakom came through. Nonetheless, I think I might have enjoyed it on the slow speed better. It’s a great way to build up tension before the big party. I wondered if this was why so many chefs were into the slow movement.
GIRL’S BEST FRIEND
Do you want an orgasm that makes you feel as though you’ve left your body and astrally traveled to a different planet? Well, then you’re in luck.
At first, I wasn’t too sure this was going to work. This hot pink vibe has a vacuum suction function to simulate oral. The idea of a suction tool anywhere near me seemed as scary as trying to put a birthday hat on my dog. OK, I don’t have a dog currently, but I used to and he was very aggressive when it came to hats or nail painting.
However, Girl’s Best Friend proved to be far easier to handle than man’s best friend. Thank you modern technology for finally giving us a vibrator that can go downtown with the best of them. It feels like this was why batteries and USB cords were invented. Will I ever need a man again? I’m not sure after this. By the time I was finished, I forgot we were in quarantine.
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