Writing About Sex When Your Lover(s) Read It All
The unexpected gains of baring it all online
Being a sex writer is a precarious endeavor, to begin with. Being one when, not only your close friends, mother, and sister reads you, but also your lovers—present and past—is… how may I put it? Interesting.
The last nine months of writing about sex have been just that. Interesting.
Apart from repeatedly coming out to people in my life with various reactions—thankfully mostly good so far—I’ve dealt with placing one saucy, uncensored story after the next, from my past and current sex life, directly under the discerning lens of my lover(s).
Many times I’ve asked myself the questions: Why do I keep doing this? Who and what is it for? And, most importantly, is it worth it?
Before I started publishing here I had already written down experiences that I wanted to share, but I was full of self-doubt and anxiety about it. I knew that my then-lover would be thrilled to read stories about our experiences together; he already adored what I had shown him—about us. But how would he feel about my recounts of past adventures? And, since we weren’t in a closed relationship, what if I were to write about current or future escapades—without him? What if I were to divulge more detail than he was comfortable…
