Safe Sex During Pregnancy
How to keep having fun while incubating a baby
Published in
5 min readMay 14, 2018
Pregnancy is often a new, frightful, yet exciting time for expecting parents. They want to do what is best for their soon-to-be child. But, you don’t need to be celibate for nine months! There are plenty of safe ways to continue enjoying your sex life, while still doing your best for your baby.
- ORAL SEX — oral sex is safe during all stages of pregnancy. The only thing you would want to avoid is blowing air into the vagina, as it is possible (although very rare) for an embolism (life-threatening blood bubble) to occur. Other than that, oral sex is fun and safe!
- VAGINAL SEX— Vaginal sex is still possible during pregnancy, and can even be more enjoyable. Thanks to more blood flow to the genitals during pregnancy, vaginal sex during this time is sometimes regarded as even more enjoyable than normal. People who are not usually able to achieve orgasms from penetration are sometimes able to during pregnancy! I have heard some partners worry they will harm the fetus, or hit the fetus with their penis, and that is just not true. The baby is very well protected in the uterus within the amniotic sac, and the cervix is also lower and sealed to further prevent anything making its way to the fetus. So you can’t bonk the child on the head, regardless of how large your penis is!
- ANAL SEX — If you’ve ever heard that anal sex is unsafe during pregnancy, that is entirely untrue! There are only two concerns with anal sex during pregnancy. The first issue is hemorrhoids. Pregnancy is known to cause nasty hemorrhoids, which often cause pain and bleeding. While it isn’t necessarily dangerous to have anal sex with hemorrhoids, it can be uncomfortable, painful and cause bleeding. The second concern is moving from anal sex to vaginal sex without cleaning off first. You don’t want to bring bacteria from the anus to the vagina even if you are not pregnant, but it can cause complications during pregnancy by introducing new bacteria. The best way to avoid this is to clean off the penis or toy before inserting it in the vagina.
- STDs/STIs — If you are using a toy, make sure it was washed well between uses, to prevent the spread of bacteria. If you have a new partner, make sure to get tested for STDs and use condoms or dental dams, as some STDs can cause problems if left untreated. For example, new cases of herpes during pregnancy are risky to both the pregnant person (due to the impact to the immune system) and the fetus (herpes occasionally can travel up the vagina to the fetus, but the biggest concern is transmitting during labor. Because of this risk, c-sections for women with new and active outbreaks are often encouraged).
As long as your doctor hasn’t told you to refrain from having sex or orgasms, sexual activity is safe and healthy during pregnancy. With a few precautions, listed above, you can continue enjoying sex throughout your pregnancy.
Best Sex Positions to Try During Each Trimester (and what to avoid)
- FIRST TRIMESTER — There really are not any restrictions on positions this early in the pregnancy. So have at it and enjoy anything you wish!
- SECOND TRIMESTER — This is when missionary and any position involving the woman on her back start to become uncomfortable. Your abdomen will be growing by now, and it might be difficult to find a comfortable way to have missionary sex. Many women get a burst of energy in the second trimester, and really enjoy taking the lead and being on top.
- THIRD TRIMESTER — This is where is becomes the hardest to find comfortable and safe positions. It is not recommended to be flat on your back at this point, as the weight of the uterus puts too much pressure on the vena cava, a major blood vessel, which decreases blood flow to the uterus/baby, as well as making you short of breath and nauseous. So avoid any positions where the woman is flat on her back. Women also have very little energy at this point, and need their partner to take the lead. Doggie style as well as spooning are both two good positions to try! Many women prefer oral sex at this stage in pregnancy, due to the difficulty in finding comfortable intercourse positions, and that’s perfectly okay as well! Also be aware that orgasms in the third trimester can cause braxton hicks contractions. These are harmless, and actually help prepare your uterus for the big day! If you get contractions after sex, drink a large glass of water and lie down on your left side for a few minutes. Braxton hicks contractions will stop. If you’re actually in labor, they will not stop, and you should call your doctor or midwife.
Now go, and enjoy yourselves (whether that is having sex, or taking a warm bath alone while surfing Medium), before your baby is born and throws you new curve-balls!
