Alternate realities, please!
Dr. Stephen Hawking once said that he finds the universe perplexing enough to lead a life where he’s basically glued to a chair. A sane person would retort, “Who isn’t?” There are chairs everywhere around us, be it in office or elsewhere. Chair is so integral to our psyche that it stands — no pun intended — for respective positions in a setup and not just something we rest our posteriors on.
Only one glitch in the above paragraph though: The first sentence isn’t true. I made that up. But, a big but, it might be true in some other universe. Who knows? The theory of parallel universe fascinates me. When we miss a train and get on the next one, it’s worth pondering that in a parallel universe, you didn’t miss the previous train and your life would be different by a matter of few minutes. Of course, such imaginative exercises don’t lead to any conclusion, mainly because we don’t know why some things happen and most things don’t. Time and its mischievous grandkids (chances) remain a mystery.
Nevertheless, we can always splash spittle of ideas on the canvas of imagination and keep guessing what is going on in the parallel universes. These are a few of the possibilities…
- Blind folks too fall in love at first sight.
- Adnan Sami and Robert Downey, Jr. are identical twins and so are Manmohan Singh and Angela Merkel.
- Rafael Nadal’s knee ligaments are stronger than Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s.
- Burning calories amounts to arson.
- Those who burst firecrackers don’t criticize those who honk at traffic or ride a Bullet proudly.
- The media does its job instead of pretending to save the world.
- Reincarnation is for real.
- All of us are effortlessly funny.
- People greet each other with a facepalm.
- The past tense of lie is laid.
- The term ‘permanent’ or ‘perfect’ doesn’t even exist.
- We are earnestly looking forward to weekdays.
- Selfie is a cute nickname for masturbation.
- Natalie Portman and i are married with three kids.
- Everybody is like “Religion? What’s that?”
- Fasting means abstaining from sleep instead of food.
- Sasural Simar Ka is directed by Christopher Nolan.
- Working hard makes you thinner instead of obese.
- Everybody longingly wonders what pain is.
- Politicians are the greatest patriots.
- Juliette Binoche is Messi’s biological mother and he plays for Liverpool.
- Nothing is a coincidence.
- Poverty is a trend, not a problem.
- We are all farmers… and happy as fuck can’t even dream of.
- The universe has far better things to do than conspire against fools like us.
For someone with a machinery accent, Dr. Hawking truly inspires a lot of us to unleash our mind’s real potential. In my case, that translates to spewing garbage in the name of random thoughts. You are welcome.
