Let’s talk about it
You know what we are more afraid of than death? Talking about death. Our society is undeniably uncomfortable about something so inevitable that you can bet your life on it. But no, please don’t talk about it. Why? It tempers down our mood and turns us into sad little fellas. You know what else should make you sad? Your miserable life due to your oath of leading a complacent existence and your admirable commitment to maintaining standards of mediocrity. Which, on the other hand, doesn’t stop you from yapping about your life wherever you can. There is a clear double standards as far as death is concerned.
Unless somebody close to you passes away.
At that point, all of a sudden, you want everybody else to be on the same plane as you. This self-imposed exile from much-needed conversations shunts us from developing ourselves as a species. Other members of the animal kingdom may act like they don’t know what death is — until they die — but we do. It’s a gift, isn’t it? We are well aware that there is a noisy station at the end we can’t possibly skip. So, why not be open about it without resorting to the apologetic tone of let’s-talk-about-something-else in a century that has superseded all channels of mortality. There’s no new way left to die. We’ve seen it all. We haven’t cured death yet but we’ve reached thresholds of delaying it to a great extent. So much so it’s hard to believe that life expectancy used to be lower than 30 during the Middle Ages. Science and technology might have turbo-pushed us to this era where less than 200,000 die on a daily basis but 300,000 babies are born in the same timeframe but we pretend as if we are going to live forever. Life is winning, particularly for humankind, but still, we aren’t OK with death being the topic of discussion. Furthermore, this nonchalance is seeping into our psyche so strongly that you will often come across people abusing nihilism for their convenience.
As a social experiment, ask your group: “How many people should show up at your funeral?” Chances are the responses you’d get would overwhelming be in the line of “Why should I care how many people show up after I am gone?” and “I will be dead so it doesn’t matter to me.”
That’s exactly where the problem lies when you don’t familiarize yourself with the concept of death and more importantly, with the culture of funeral. There’s not a tribe in the world that doesn’t value the final goodbye. Because, contrary to what most people tend to assume, the funeral isn’t for them. It’s for the people you leave behind. It’s a support system for those who need it when you aren’t there to lend any. And we’d know this intrinsically if we don’t shy away from topics that make our fear come alive for a change. It’s high time we helped art with the burden of reminding us what’s going to happen — ultimately.
