Taking giant leaps

Lance Armstrong may have cheated at the Tour de France but his testicles are a pair of inspiration for millions out there. Like he once said, “One small step for man, a giant leap for steroids.” Actually these are not his actual words. They were something to the effect of “If I can beat cancer, i can bloody beat anything — even WADA!” Alright, he never really said them either. But you get the point, right? Oh, you don’t? Well, if you aren’t aware YET, Lance has been stripped of all the titles he won between ’98 and ’05 at Tour de France on charges of doping. But what is interesting (and nonetheless, hypocritical) is that the other cycling championships he won during the same period remain his. At least for the time being. In any case, it’s difficult to gauge a guy who fought testicular cancer only to bounce back into the annals of legends. Now, with this shocking news of his court-martial spreading far and wide, cycling as a sport is going to suffer the most. After all, we’ve got to keep in mind that bicycles are the vehicle of the future as the oil is depleting and horses won’t continue to tolerate human nonsense. If this notion sounds farfetched, so be it. But what’s more contemporary is the fact that Lance proved that it’s humanly possible to win the most gruelling sporting event on earth seven times in a row (drugs or no drugs). And what happened to him also shows that in the race called life, even doping doesn’t help.

PS: Coming back to another Armstrong named Neil to whom the original quote is attributed, i hope he takes a halt at Moon on his way towards Heaven. If those conspiracy theories are false, he was the closest a human could get to the farthest point possible for the first time ever. I didn’t know you were alive and now i learn of your demise. Ignorance is a bitch. RIP, sir.