Breaking News: GOD joins Twitter!

TIMESOFHEAVEN.COM

HEAVEN: After a lot of dilly-dallying, God finally opened a Twitter account today in order to follow #thoughtsandprayers so he can directly keep a track on our prayers.

Not long ago, God used to face a lot of difficulty in managing the prayers, as his 1 TB hard disk that he bought from Amazon in flash discount sale was not having enough space to store all the prayers.

Now, with a broadband connection and unlimited tweets that Twitter allows through its cloud servers, God can just click on a hashtag to see all outstanding prayer requests in seconds. And with the help of Twitter LIKE button, all God has to do is to ‘Like’ a post to approve a prayer. In this busy modern age, that’s indeed very handy.

Furthermore, with the ‘@’ tagging feature, God can tag Allah, Bhagwan, Buddha, and other Gods to send them a misdirected tweet, thus efficiently managing the prayer approval process. All the Gods seem to really like this system as it appears to work efficiently for everyone.

With this social media upgrade, experts predict a reduction in the corruption levels prevalent in the Godly system as well. “The people will now have an option to skip a lot of (fake) Saints and Babas who used to take an enormous amount of bribe in order to pass on a prayer to God. Now with the help of Twitter, people can directly send his prayers to God,” said an expert.