Have You Seen My Ball?
I know it’s round here somewhere.
Seen on a Lost and Found bulletin board somewhere in Minnesota:
LOST
One ball. Went missing around five months ago. The usual resting spot was empty in my Custom Xtendacab. Looked all around and didn’t see my ball anywhere. It musta rolled on out of my truck when I wasn’t lookin.
I checked all the usual spots it can get lost in — the laundry room, kitchen, and garden. I even checked the church in case I forgot that I went there that one time. I have not found any of the other spots it could be.
Asked my buds if they had seen it. Everyone but Gar said no. He looked shifty and said he did at the bar across the state line. He’s got to be lyin as my ball would never end up in a dive like that.
That’s where people go to find somebody new.
Ma and Pa said to get a new one, but my old one is all broken in. There’s no point in breaking in something else. Too much dough for that. I’ll keep the one I got.
So if you see my ball around, would you call me? 555–877–2536. Leave a message, and I’ll call ya right back. Oh and don’t try to grab the ball as it’s a slippery little thing. The chain is right where I left it, waiting for her.
She’s my property after all.
The name is on the chain and everything. It’s worn and scuffed but the letters are still there.
Helen.
