I Told You It Was a Bad Idea
A Story Told In Dialogue
“You’re such an idiot! You’re not supposed to eat it!”
“What? Why not!? It’s just a piece of fruit.”
“Really. We’re being held captive in a freaking lab. The apple is glowing, for Pete’s sake!”
“We’ve been stuck here for hours. And all we have is the apple and a note that says ‘Eat me.’”
“That doesn’t mean you listen!”
“What other choice do we have? Starve?”
“Yes! I’d rather starve than become a lab rat!”
“Well, you can twist that door handle and yell all you want. It’s not going to open. I, on the other hand, am going to do something actively productive. If we do what they say, maybe they’ll let us out.”
“Riiight. ‘Cause that always works in the movies.”
“One: This isn’t the movies. And two: It doesn’t taste that bad, a little tangy but alright.”
“You’re insane.”
“Come on. Nothing’s happened! I feel fine.”
“Says the slime oozing out of your skin.”
“Huh.”
“And now you’re turning green.”
“I….don’t feel so good.”
“You know, I told you it was a bad idea.”
“Ribbit.”
“And now I’m talking to a frog.”
“Ribbit.”
“Yep. You said it. We’re fucked.”
— — Meanwhile — —
“Well, isn’t that a shame? They were supposed to turn into a rabbit this time. Dispose of Patient 376 and move Patient 377 to a new room for further testing. And, for good measure, we’ll need another test group. Find me more test subjects.”
“Right way, sir.”
