I’m back on reading fiction after a while. I continue my modern Japanese literature journey with another female writer. I guess there has been a lot of hype about this book. The book is titled Breasts and Eggs by Mieko Kawakami, with English translation by Sam Bett and David Boyd.
It’s a great book if you are curious to question why don’t we let women decide their own path?
One of big questions that I believe highly relevant in a patriarchal society.
The book is divided by two parts, with one woman named Natsuko as the center of its story. However, we will learn from various woman’s perspective throughout this book. The first part is mostly from her niece and her older sister. While the second part is mostly about herself questioning her decision to have a child without a partner.
I like how this book raises questions about being a woman in the world today. And how Mieko Kawakami putting shocking bits one after another. This book is a good page-turner. Especially, if you have proper time in holidays to enjoy it.
I highlighted the first paragraph right away.
If you want to know how poor somebody was growing up, ask them how many windows they had. Don’t ask what was in their fridge or in their closet. The number of windows says it all.
In the first part, the journal of Midoriko is my favorite highlight. She wrote a journal about many things, about her emotion on growing up, about her observation, and about her questions.
It feels like I’m trapped inside my body. It decides when I get hungry, and when I’ll get my period. From birth to death, you have to keep eating and making money just to stay alive. I see what working every night does to my mum. It takes it out of her.
But what’s it all for? Life is hard enough with just one body. Why would anyone ever want to make another one?
-Midoriko
There are more thought-provoking questions entering the second part of the book where Natsuko struggles with her questions.
When people say they want kids, what is it they actually want? Lots of folks would say they want to have a baby with their partner, but what’s the difference between wanting that and wanting your own baby? It felt like people with kids knew something at the onset that I still couldn’t understand.
And then the question about donor conception and parent’s ego.
Being a parent means placing your child’s wellbeing, your child’s happiness, above your own. That’s what it takes. But donor conception is all about the parents, about their egos. Having a child has always been determined by forces beyond our control, by nature. But with donor conception, it’s all about ego.
Yes, the egos of the parents, but also the egos of the doctors, who view the life they bring into the world as an end that glorifies the means. For them, this is simply about showing off. No more than a test of their abilities.
But, then there is also a great question about the right of having a child without having sex.
But what if sex was out of the equation? What if you were alone? All the books and blogs catered to couples. What about the rest of us, who were alone and planned to stay that way? Who has the right to have a child? Does not having a partner or not wanting to have sex nullify this right?
There are a lot of witty parts too.
I saw something on TV the other day. They were interviewing this old woman from some other country. She had to be 109 or 110. Really up there. And the reporter asked her. ‘What’s the secret to long life?’ You know what she said? ‘Stay away from men.’
I mean, she’s right, you know?
And then followed with deeper and deeper questions nearing the end of the second part of the book.
What if you have a child, and that child wishes with every bone in her body that she’d never been born?
Why do people see no harm in having children? They do it with smiles on their faces, as if it’s not an act of violence. You force this other being into the world, this being that never asked to be born. You do this absurd thing because that’s what you want for yourself, and that doesn’t make any sense.
The discussions that followed are getting more emotional.
Whatever the reason, it’s all the same. Do you see what I mean?
It’s always about them. They are only thinking about themselves. They never think about the kid being born. No one gives a damn how that child is going to feel. Isn’t that crazy? Once thay’ve had a baby, most parents would do anything to shelter them from any form of pain or suffering. But here it is, the only way to actually keep your child from ever knowing pain: don’t have them in the first place.
The really horrible part is that this bet isn’t yours to make. You are betting with another person’s life. Not yours.
But, then the journey to Natsuko’s resolution on her choice is heartwarming.
People are strange. They know nothing lasts forever, but still find time to laugh and cry and get upset, creating things and breaking things apart. I know it seems like none of it makes sense. But, these things make life worth living. So don’t let anything get you down.
It’s great that in the end of the book Natsuko is having a choice of her own and she is ready to accept what comes to her following her choice.
Overall, it’s still an enjoyable read. And I am still curious for more Mieko Kawakami’s work.
And for all the children (us) in this world:
Children need to be raised by real families, in real homes, in an atmosphere full of love and responsibility. Every child brought into this world, by artificial insemination or any other means, is an example of the gift of life, and I believe their life deserves to be cherished.
