Leaving The Comfort Zone

Dear Reader,

I have been a faithful reader of Medium for almost 3 years now, if not more, and it has been a while that I wanted to start posting but never had the courage to do so. I can always find an excuse not to post. Any excuse. Anything from the starting date is weird, to the weather, to not knowing what picture to post with the article, to not knowing the perfect title to put up and the list goes on.

I started a blog when I was 16, maybe even before that, but at some point i decided to delete all the posts I’ve written because I thought my writing is not good enough. I was never a patient person and asking me to keep posting and writing to improve wouldn’t have helped. At 18 I decided to go back to it, this time with a promise that if it didn’t work out I’ll just stop posting and never delete anything for the sake of my future self. My insecurity towards the quality of things I write are ridiculous, to the point where I don’t feel comfortable sharing links with people. I cringe when someone tells me they read my blog.

I started appreciating letter writing when I moved to the UK in 2010 for my undergraduate degree. I sent emails to my sister updating her with the things I’ve done and the places I’ve seen. Complaining about things or making plans for when she comes over. It wasn’t until I received a physical letter from my mother that I really started appreciating letter writing.

In October 2014, at the age of 22, I started writing letters to my 26 year old self. I found comfort in an age I associated with settling and figuring things out. I thought that 4 years would be enough time for me to figure everything out and make things go according to plan. I continue to be naive thinking it’s that easy but I like having something to look forward to. Since then, I’ve written 17 letters and I continue to do so.

There is something satisfying about writing open letters and being able to freely express a concern or share a piece of advice. It’s also nice to send a genuine thank you, a sad goodbye or even an enthusiastic motivational letter. Most importantly, it’s another way of documenting whatever you feel like documenting. I’ve always wanted to share my writing just because I know the more I write the better I might get at it but I always worried just like any person would. I worried it won’t be good enough or who would consider reading it. I understand that shouldn’t matter.

Please join me on this journey as I step out of my comfort zone and attempt to write and fully share it for people to read and judge.

Signed, sealed, undelivered,

Maria