I’m Glad I Ended Up at the Pharmacy.

A few days ago Elias and I had to go to the pediatrician again for sickness. While there, we found out he also had another ear ache — so off to Kroger pharmacy we went. I was not happy about this as it was the 4th time he had come down with something in January. While we were there we got him his medicine as well as some comfort foods and then went to stand in line at the check-out. Behind us was a woman who was alone, and behind her was a mother with a son who looked about 4 years old, as well as a baby girl who couldn’t have been older than 3 or 4 months. Her son was standing next to her and the baby was in her carrier in the stroller. The few items the woman was getting were stored in the bottom of the stroller, and as she bent down to get them out and put them on the counter, it started. All of a sudden, the four-year old son went from whining to throwing a full-on temper tantrum. He was screaming, began hitting things, including his mother, and started stomping his feet and shouting. He wanted something that his mother told him he couldn’t have, and it escalated quickly.

As I stood there in line, my heart went out to this woman. You could tell she was doing her very best to remain calm and patient.

“We do NOT hit. “(more hitting and screaming)

“I am not responding to you when you act like this.” (continued crying)

“Buddy, when we get home, I want you to know you are going to be in time out for behaving like this.” (cue the incredibly high-pitched scream)

“I’m sorry but you are not going to get anything you want acting this way.”

This went on for about 3 minutes.

Pretty soon the baby in the stroller started crying because of the fit her brother was having and the woman looked at her son desperately, asking him to please stop because he was upsetting his sister. This is a lot for anyone to handle, period. Add to it being in a public place, people watching, feeling judgement from those around that are annoyed by this outburst, and it would probably upset even the most peaceful of saints.

When it seemed as if the tantrum had reached its peak and I was sure any minute now the mother was going to abandon her groceries and leave, the woman standing in front of her in line turned around and said, “You are doing a great job. Just stay strong and patient. You have GOT this.”

I will never forget the look on that mother’s face when she heard those words. Her eyes immediately filled up with tears and she fought them back with a smile that said, If I don’t smile right now I may totally lose it in the middle of Kroger. Her voice was shaky, caught by the frog in her throat, but she whispered out, “Thank You,” and then stopped talking so as not to cry more.

Before I knew what I was saying I shouted out, “You got this Mama! You are awesome!” Then, to my right in the next aisle over two more mothers with toddlers offered cheers of genuine encouragement. The woman in front of the mom then began to help her unload her groceries from the stroller so she could pull her son aside and try to settle him down. As I was pulling out of the parking lot I saw her still with the mom, carrying her groceries out to the car and talking to her. They were both smiling and the boy seemed to have calmed down.

In that moment I was hit with an overwhelming urge to burst into tears. That could have been just a normal scenario in a grocery store where a kid freaks out and everyone ignores it but is secretly annoyed. Instead, it was a beautiful display of someone choosing to say, Hey, I see you. I notice you. And I want to encourage you and build you up instead of tear you down even more. This was an incredible example of the peace and unity that could come if we stood together and beside one another in love. Not judgement. LOVE. Love is what drives out darkness. Compassion is what changes atmospheres. Kindness is what leads to heart change.

I have been on the other side of fence. Pre-marriage and children, I have been the person thinking, Gosh- get your kid under control. I think at all times we have said and thought things that we wouldn’t ever say or think today. The beauty in the revelation and growth is the ability to change the way we think and react. We have the wonderful opportunity to improve ourselves and our responses every day. It just takes a choice. The choice to love and not to hate. The choice to notice one another and respect one another. It doesn’t have to be on a large scale. One person at a time is all it takes. That day I was proud to be a mother, proud to be a woman, and proud to be a human who witnessed unity and partnership. We are all in this life together — let’s make it a great one.