101 Ways to Keep it 100

Image taken from a 404 page for trinitynewlife.com — that’s NOT keeping it 100 fam

Are you keeping it 100 today?

In no particular order, here are 101 ways you can keep it 100.

  1. Your friend has a bat in the cave — tell her about it. Keep it 100.
  2. You pissed yourself a little laughing at that joke — tell your funny friend how funny they are. Keep it 100.
  3. You take a badass pic in front of a badass car. Hashtag it #squadgoals because you don’t own that car, so don’t act like it. Keep it 100.
  4. You know socks with sandals look dumb. You rock it anyways. Keep it 100.
  5. “Those pants don’t make you look fat, the way you destroyed that hot fudge sundae did though.” Keep it 100.
  6. You’ve walked by your bathroom mirror without looking at it for the last month. Just because you don’t look at yourself doesn’t mean you haven’t spent the month destroying chili dogs. Keep it 100.
  7. You’re in your 30s. It’s not the new 20s. Stop saying stupid shit like that. Keep it 100.
  8. You’re in your 40s. It’s not the new 20s. Stop saying stupid shit like that. Keep it 100.
  9. You’re in your 50s… most people rock their 5os hard cuz it means they’re gonna retire soon and their kids are out of the house and they finally have extra money. Buy that dope ride. Keep it 100.
  10. You like Empire and want a bad bitch like Cookie. Stop lying. Keep it 100.
  11. The only rap lyrics you know is Dear Mama by Tupac, that’s okay. Keep it 100.
  12. You don’t have time to do things because you waste hours getting high. Seems like a terrible life choice, but you do you. Keep it 100.
  13. Stop saying shit like “I’m gonna make the next Facebook.” You’re not. Keep it 100.
  14. “It’s the Uber of [STOP INSERTING THINGS HERE].” Keep it 100.
  15. Treat yo self. Keep it 100.
  16. Admit you never read a single thing about what Hilary Clinton actually stands for but instead you just see all your friends posting about Bernie Sanders and so you also post and vote for Bernie Sanders. Keep it 100.
  17. Realize that you set out for an impossible goal of making 101 of these and now you regret it. Stop at #17. Post your failure anyway. Keep it 100.
  18. Shit. You thought of another one. Ask people to comment below to help you get to 101 Ways to Keep it 100. Keep it 100.

Help me out — what are 83 more ways to keep it 100? (comment below or don’t. Keep it 100)

No spam. Ever.

Article inspired by Brian Dooley and the inability of his friends to keep it 100.

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