relate to emotional intelligence

The ability to acknowledge and understand your emotions and those of others, and be able to control your behavior and relationships is known as emotional intelligence (Jordan &Ashkanasy, 2006). Unlike Intelligence Quotient (IQ), emotional intelligence is a learned skill which changes with time. Emotional intelligence is categorized into two broad categories, that is, personal and social competencies.

Personal competencies

1. Self-awareness

Self-awareness is the ability to correctly identify your personal emotions at a particular moment. This skill allows you to identify what motivates and satisfies you. These skills also allow you understand what you do well and what pushes your buttons. There are various ways I use to create and develop my self-awareness skills, which enhance my personal emotional intelligence.

They include:

i. Creating time to reflect on myself

ii. Acknowledging my actual emotions and feelings

iii. Always identifying my values and intentions

iv. Seeking feedback from people I trust

v. Identifying my hot buttons and triggers

These skills have improved my ability in making sound decisions while responding to people and situations. I can now effectively respond to a wide range of interpersonal interactions I encounter every day in various situations. My objective of practicing self-awareness skills is to become self-reliant and self-motivated in the most effective way possible. I intend to keep practicing these skills since I believe they enable one in pursuing the right opportunities and keeping emotions that hold you back.

2. Self-management

Self-management, also known as self-control, is the ability to accurately take control of one’s emotions and behavior. They are skills that help one bear emotional uncertainties and directing one’s behavior in a positive way (George, 2000).

Some of the strategies I use in enhancing my self-control include:

i. Taking a few deep breaths

ii. Counting to ten

iii. Talking or writing the situation out

iv. Weighing both sides of the situation

v. Acknowledging that the situation will end in a short while

vi. Having a positive self-conversation

vii. Taking time off the situation

Self-management skills help me control negative energies and in maintaining my standards of honesty and integrity. I can now effectively respond positively to changes and take responsibility for my performances.

Social Competencies

1. Social awareness

Social awareness is the ability to effectively perceive and acknowledge other people’s emotions and worries. It is the ability to recognize other people’s feelings and perspective. Social awareness enables one to understand the development and support needs of other people.

In my case, I practice social awareness through:

i. Active listening

ii. Watching body language

iii. Having a wide perspective

iv. Considering the individuals’ and groups’ needs.

v. Greeting people by their names

My social awareness practices have assisted me in identifying other people’s tensions, changes, and needs. But I need to find out a better way of understanding emotional triggers of other people. Besides that, I know how to develop trust and build lasting relationships with other people.

2. Relationship management

Relationship management is the ability to create, develop, sustain, and influence relationships. In building and managing relationships, one requires self-awareness, self-management, and social awareness. Examples of relationship management skills are influence, conflict management, building bonds, developing others, change catalyst, and teamwork (Bratton, Dodd, & Brown, 2011).

I build my relationship management skills through:

i. Acknowledging feelings and showing compassion

ii. Explaining my decisions

iii. Matching my actions with my intentions

iv. Handling tough conversations

v. Positively accepting feedback

vi. Giving direct and constructive feedback

Relationship management is a social emotional intelligence that I have developed over time as I interact with different kinds of people. I have learned how to communicate clearly and effectively manage conflicts. I believe that every relationship should offer some benefits. However, I would like to practice more on giving constructive feedback, and ways of giving praise and motivation.