Real Ghosts Don’t Ghost

Illustration by Winna CL

As a ghost, I’m tired of this dating term “ghosting.” It offends all actual ghosts. Personally, I’m proud to haunt you wherever you are. Following you around while you go about your daily tasks, knocking cups off the table to remind you of my presence, and making distant noises in my ghoulish voice while you try to sleep.

Real ghosts don’t go around cutting contact without explanation. We obsessively try to make contact…