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20 Things My Suburban Parents Whispered At Youth Soccer Games

The other coach has an accent. We’re fucked.

Source: Torsten Bolton via Wikimedia Commons
  1. There are, like, twelve red teams here. Is this a Sherwin Williams?
  2. Ok, I just Googled some soccer rules we can complain about.
  3. Is my hangover showing under this Dad cap?
  4. Remember: a missed shot is just a pass…

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Medium humor. Large laughs.

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Come for the laughs. Stay for the pity.

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