A Real-Life Emily Pitches Alternatives To “Emily In Paris”
Emily in Paris? This Emily’s never been to Europe at all! But she has been to these other, equally exciting locations that are perfect for a Netflix spinoff show!
Emily in Panera
Full of endless bread bowl possibilities, Emily always feels weird about ordering a side of bread with a bowl of bread. But she’s just that kind of crazy fun millennial! Why not take an extra lemon from the free tray? Or maybe even hoard the honey bear despite all the weird looks she gets? Be yourself!
Emily in Prairie Village, Kansas
To get some excellent brownies, affordable vintage clothes, and witness some not-so-thinly veiled White privilege. As part of Kansas City’s most affluent metropolitan areas, the parks are clean and the possibility anyone will talk to your Filipino family at a garage sale is zero! Shoot for the moon!
Emily in Puberty
This throwback spinoff finds Emily as an unpopular teenage playwright known for her incurable Rosacea and unmissable orange t-shirt collection. YOLO!
Emily in Parallel Parking Hell
During her driver’s test, the instructor Mr. Elliot cites Emily’s sweating and rambling as being a perfectionist, when they both know it’s a sign she is bad at driving. Hooray for trying though! Park like nobody is watching!
Emily in Paleontology Heaven
Nothing thrills a vibrant 20-something more than assembling a T-Rex while a dangerous election looms in the backdrop. The bones of the terrible lizard remind her that all creatures will eventually turn to dust. And the label on the box that says “for 8+” reminds her of her limited brain capabilities. Everything happens for a reason!
Emily in Pan’s Labyrinth
Where the creature with the eyeball hands coincided with a weird bout of stomach flu. Could he see that coming? If so, why wouldn’t he tell Emily to lay off the gummy bears! Live and learn, Pale Man!
Emily at Paramount Pictures Studios
Where she is offered a Power Bar, but she stuffs more than one in her pocket because she just moved to LA! If life gives you a Power Bar, take Power Bars!
Emily in Panic Mode
At jury duty, when the judge says “If anyone here doesn’t live in Manhattan, you’re in the wrong location,” but Emily is too shy to say anything even though she totally lives in Brooklyn! Then she has to tell the bailiff, who tells the judge and basically laughs at her, and then Emily is escorted out of the courtroom and asked not to come back again. Live, laugh, love!