Avocados On Tinder
The time is always ripe for avocados.
3 miles away: “Good-Looking”
I look perfect, firm, and strong, but once you take me home, you’ll find out just how rotten I am. You probably won’t want to bother going all the way back to the market to start looking again, so you’ll hang on to me longer than you should. When friends say you’re trying too hard, you’ll point out that I have good and bad parts, like everyone else. But in the end, you’ll realize I wasn’t worth it. And I’ll feel angry that you tried to use me.
4 miles away: “Taking It Slow”
You’ll notice that my exterior is particularly hard, but you’ll keep telling yourself that if you wait long enough, I’ll soften up. Sadly, no matter how many times you take me out, I will never be ready. By the time I am, you’ll have moved on and forgotten me. And when you finally look for me again, I’ll have gone bad.
2 miles away: “All The Good Ones Are Not Taken”
Don’t misjudge me because I look wrinkly or spotted — inside, I’m perfect! I’m a little green, sure, but that’s only because I’ve been overlooked. I understand your reluctance to try again — you’ve been hurt by all the ones who turned out to be the pits. I’m aware of my flaws — I’m slightly…
