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Illustrations by Liza Leonard

Compliment Sandwich Recipes for My Fragile Ego

Kevin Lawson
Jul 11, 2019 · 3 min read

It is widely noted that we as a society are becoming more and more fragile, and I am no exception. Therefore, the traditional “compliment sandwich” — a criticism within two compliments — is no longer a sufficiently gentle feedback method. Here is a list of compliment sandwich recipes that have been adapted for my fragile ego.

The Compliment Carboloader
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Criticism
• Compliment
• Compliment

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The Compliment Carboloader

The Compliment B.L.T.
• Big round of applause
• Laudation
• Trophy

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The Compliment B.L.T.

The Compliment Slider
• Compliment
• Tiny little criticism
• Compliment

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The Compliment Slider

The Compliment $5 Footlong
• Criticism accompanied by a crisp $5 bill

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The Compliment $5 Footlong

The Compliment Sandwich Sandwich
• Compliment
• Criticism
• Compliment
• Actual sandwich
• Compliment
• Criticism
• Compliment

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The Compliment Sandwich Sandwich

Compliment Salad
• Many compliments all mixed together with no criticism at all

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Compliment Salad

The Compliment Loaf
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Criticism
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Compliment
• Compliment

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The Compliment Loaf

The Compliment Calzone
• Compliment with a scalding hot criticism folded inside it

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The Compliment Calzone

Compliment Toast
• Two multigrain compliments
• Avocado

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Compliment Toast

Compliment Soup
• No specific compliment, but a general essence of warmth and acceptance that feels better than any cluster of words ever could

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Compliment Soup

The Grilled Cheese
• One recognition that I can’t handle the criticism, so let’s just split a sandwich
• Bread
• Cheese
• Bread

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The Grilled Cheese

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Kevin Lawson

Written by

Comedy writer!

Slackjaw

Slackjaw

Medium humor. Large laughs.

Kevin Lawson

Written by

Comedy writer!

Slackjaw

Slackjaw

Medium humor. Large laughs.

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