Do You Suffer From Artistic Vision? Now There’s A Drug For That
Rizapan lets you live the good life & your art thrive (ie, become just generic and poppy enough to finally be profitable)
Do you suffer from your terrible clarity?
Do you see far beyond the scope of the common person?
Are you haunted by prescient dreams and visions?
Now there’s Rizapan (RIZE-a-pan): the Vision Quencher (TM)
Rizapan’s twelve patent-pending beta blockers calm the onset signs of nasty vision so you can live normally.
“Before Rizapan, I would stay up ’til all hours of the morning working on these long, pointless symphonies, and boy, was my health suffering. Now I can get a good night’s sleep, have a hearty breakfast, watch some TV, and still get a few games of golf in before noon! Thank you, Rizapan!”
– L. Beethoven
“Before Rizapan, I was obsessed with making these weird, disproportional drawings. I was living in some decrepit shack god-knows-where on the outskirts of France. Women were irrelevant to me, and I slowly alienated all my family and friends. Well, that’s all behind me now. I’ve been employed at the local car dealership for two years, and I’m happy to say, I’ve never felt better! Right honey? (And — we’re expecting our first child!)…
