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Elon Musk Redesigns The Cybertruck For Rednecks
You’ll be begging to put the hammer down in one of these big-rigs.
Welcome to the second Cybertruck unveiling here in the great city of Dallas, Texas. After blindly swan-diving into the pickup market last year, I hit some stiff resistance with American truck owners. Lookin’ at you in the front row, cowboy!
I thought a simple display of power would end it, so I made a video of the Cybertruck dragging a tractor-trailer up the north face of the Matterhorn. After that cinematic middle-finger was posted, I waited for the dump trucks full of money to pull into my driveway. Instead, all I got were complaints that no self-respecting country-boy would buy a “robot cross-dressing as a pickup truck.”
You know what? I convinced every douche bag in the financial sector to trade in their Maserati for a sexy new Tesla. What makes you think I can’t make you rednecks beg to put the hammer down in one of these big-rigs?
Franz, roll it out.
We started by adding some trim to help you fit in at your next tailgate party. You’ll see the new redesign has mud flaps laser-engraved with an image of Calvin urinating on an ISIS flag. Dual rifle racks are mounted inside the cabin and we added a radio antenna here on the hood with a little plastic…
