Every Possible Explanation For The Scars On The Ripped Male Protagonist’s Back Wordlessly Revealed As He Took Off His Shirt

Michelle Spies
Jul 16, 2018 · 2 min read
Image for post
Image for post

Ah, here we are somewhere in the mid-to late first act of this action thriller, campy horror, or brooding romance film and the sexy, rugged male protagonist has taken off his shirt for some reason. Maybe he was showering or changing or just taking off his shirt to walk around because they do that, but regardless the act has revealed some sizeable scars covering his ripped back.

Yet tragically, we are not given the gift of verbal exposition of the origins of these wounds, and thusly we are hooked for the remaining 2 or 3 acts.

However, if you’re looking to save yourself the time and mental anguish, here is an exhaustive list of explanations for those obviously plot-rich scars on the protagonist’s back.

Slackjaw

Medium humor. Large laughs.

Sign up for Yapjaw

By Slackjaw

Yapjaw is Medium's #1 newsletter for all things humor, and we're sorry to say you'll only receive it a few times a month. Take a look

By signing up, you will create a Medium account if you don’t already have one. Review our Privacy Policy for more information about our privacy practices.

Check your inbox
Medium sent you an email at to complete your subscription.

Michelle Spies

Written by

Chicago-based. CONTRIBUTOR: The Onion, Clickhole. FREELANCE: Onion Labs. Other: Botnik Studios, Mcsweeneys. TWEETER: @spies_please | www.michellespies.com

Slackjaw

Slackjaw

Medium humor. Large laughs.

Michelle Spies

Written by

Chicago-based. CONTRIBUTOR: The Onion, Clickhole. FREELANCE: Onion Labs. Other: Botnik Studios, Mcsweeneys. TWEETER: @spies_please | www.michellespies.com

Slackjaw

Slackjaw

Medium humor. Large laughs.

Welcome to a place where words matter. On Medium, smart voices and original ideas take center stage - with no ads in sight. Watch
Follow all the topics you care about, and we’ll deliver the best stories for you to your homepage and inbox. Explore
Get unlimited access to the best stories on Medium — and support writers while you’re at it. Just $5/month. Upgrade

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store