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Excuse Me, One Of The Strippers Stole My Hat And I’d Appreciate If I Could Have It Back Please
If you need a description of the hat I can provide one.
Pardon me, sir. If I could have your attention please for a moment I’d like to inform you — head of security for this establishment — of a crime that just took place. One of the strippers stole my hat and I would like to have it back at the earliest convenience.
It occurred just moments ago in the main room. I was sitting alone, taking in the sights and sounds of Ebony Pin-Up Girlz Gentlemen’s Club & Grill when a rubenesque sex worker by the name of Destinee took my drink from my hand. I felt it was her seductive way of asking me to buy her a drink without saying anything. She was quite thirsty and finished the rest of it.
I said, “To whom do I owe this pleasure?” She made a face and asked what was in the drink. I said, “It’s a Shirley Temple on the rocks — not to be confused with a Roy Rogers which is a slightly heavier mixed beverage of cola and grenadine instead of Shirley’s signature ginger ale base. My complexion can’t handle dark syrup so I always opt for a Shirley T over a Ro-Ro. Now Arnold Palmer? That’s another story.” She looked confused and so I elaborated further.
