Have The Ultimate Spring Break In ‘Tica!
You’ll just melt for this polar party paradise.
--
Cowritten by Sarah Garfinkel and Sara K. Runnels
Cabo, South Padre, and Miami are great destinations if you want a totally unoriginal, hot mess Spring Break with 100-degree temperatures, too many crop tops, and absolutely zero penguins. That’s why this year’s most lit destination is the world’s southernmost party town and fifth largest continent! Get ready to rage like the world is ending in Antarctica. Or, as we’ve rashly rebranded it: ‘Tica!
‘Tica recently registered a high of 69 degrees (NICE!), which is how it swiftly became the top spot to go balls-to-the-ice-walls with your chill friends for a week of midnight-sun and global-warming-inspired fun! This is a once-in-a-lifetime trip — not only because the end-of-days are looming — but because you’ll experience literally wild party animals, lowkey continental drift vibes, Insta-worthy views of rising sea levels, and other exclusive activities that will make all your bros say, “damn, I wish I were in ‘Tica!”
Getting to ‘Tica
It’s up to you! Here at ‘Tica Breakers HQ, we empower you to find your own way to polar party paradise. Figure out the perfect flight-boat-Uber-military-van-snowmobile combo for you — and we’ll take care of the rest. If you must know, the most common method of transportation is a cruise ship from Argentina, which sails through the rough waters of the Drake Passage. Barring factors like weather, cost, and reality, this is where we’ll helicopter in Drake for a pre-party boat concert!
Staying in ‘Tica
This year’s ‘Tica Spring Break theme is: CAMP. You’ll see this theme carried out mostly in our housing situation, which might seem a little intense at first. We have exactly 12 high-quality tents available on a first-come, first-serve basis. But since the Internet here is AOL dial-up and our technology always freezes up, we won’t really know how many are coming until everyone arrives in ‘Tica (which is completely, definitely prepared for a massive group)!
Packing List
Don’t forget to pack these classic Spring Break essentials: