FOR LOVE OR PEANUT BUTTER
How Deleting The Dating Apps Depleted (Some Of) My Existential Dread
I was tired of thinking about all of the matches who were either bugging the shit out of me (handsy French guy) or straight-up ghosting me.
I deleted the apps back in November 2019. That’s right: pre-COVID, before it was cool. The only time I’ve ever been a hipster: when I gave up on finding love on the internet well before a global pandemic forced the rest of the world to follow suit.
I was just going about my business, perusing the dating apps (Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, with a dash of Match and eHarmony on the side), meeting up with potential suitors, and trying to come up with the perfect comeback to, “Oh you’re a comedian? Tell me a joke!” other than punching them square in the face. Until my dear friend Amanda, who’d recently become a life coach and taken me on as a client, suggested that maybe I needed a break from dating.
Um, excuse me?
I’d “taken a break” before; the kind where I was still very much addicted to Tinder/Bumble/Hinge and still constantly thought about all of the matches who were either bugging the shit out of me (the handsy French guy) or straight-up ghosting me (the hot…