I Asked Soccer Commentator Ray Hudson To Narrate My Day And It Was Magisterial!
Ray showed me that everything I do is like a gazelle that’s developed a taste for meat: brutally majestic.
Watching soccer or fútbol masterminds like Messi, Ronaldo, and Mbappé is already a delight. But listening to Ray Hudson’s commentaries on these visionary players? That’s a religious and spiritual experience. I don’t have the skills or body shape (#DadBodFC all day) to compete at the highest levels in sports, but I still want to feel what Mr. Hudson evokes. So I asked Ray to spend a day commenting on all of my everyday tasks. Below are the best snippets of what was a truly magisterial day!
6:50 AM: Waking Up
He’s got options… and ah, AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! He’s done it again! He once again emerges like a lion making its first roar of the day. He reigns over his domain! There is no alarm clock needed, no morning wake-up call, no jostling from his mother. He’s an adult man and he is ready to lay claim to the day, indeed!
6:55 AM: Brushing Teeth
Oh! My! God! Nothing less than an odontophiliac’s dream! He opens his mouth to brush off the debris, but his teeth shine like the afterlife’s ivory towers and mountains…
