I Miss The Good Old Days When You Would Go To A Website And Read It

Alex Baia
Slackjaw
Published in
3 min readJul 24, 2024

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Photo by Andrea Piacquadio.

My god, look at the two of you. So big. Sit down and talk to your gramps for a minute.

The world is darn crazy these days with all of this AI and the robots. By Jove, it’s bananas!

I’ll tell you two whippersnappers a story. After all, it’s a gramps’s right to reminiscence about an idealized past in a way that’s not entirely accurate but also contains a kernel of truth.

When I was young, we used to go to websites and read them. It was incredible. This was — oh, it must have been sometime in the late 2000s or early 2010s. The golden age of website articles!

I once read an entire website article about dinosaurs. My god, you wouldn’t believe the size of this article. It must have been four thousand words long. No, four thousand words, Patrick, not seconds. This was an article, not a video. Words on a page, my boy. Well, a laptop, not a paper page— I’m not that ancient.

Anyway, there I sat for thirty minutes reading a single website article. I swear on your grandma’s grave. And this article, well, hell, it talked about how most folks thought a meteor slammed into Earth and killed ’em dinos, but there was a renegade scientist who thought a bunch of earthquakes killed ’em dinos. And here I am reading this damned masterpiece of science…

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Alex Baia
Slackjaw

Humor writer, book junkie, stargazer, optimist. Resident philosophy major. Get my humor newsletter: https://alexbaia.com/humor