If Calls from Your Doctor Were Like Calls from Your Alma Mater
We know you have such fond memories of our hospital
Doctor: Hi, I’m calling for Suzanne Castro. This is Dr. Rubenstein.
Patient: Hi, Dr. Rubenstein.
Doctor: I have the results of your STD panel. But first, I wanted to ask if you have a second to support John T. Hughes Hospital with a generous monetary contribution.
Patient: Wait, can you just give me my results?
Doctor: I’m very eager to share your results. But first, I’m thrilled to share some exciting initiatives we have in the pipeline. This summer, Hughes Hospital will be installing a new lawn. We know you’ve had some fantastic memories of spending time on that lawn as a patient, crossing it on your way to your appointments. And then back again when you were heading home. You might even call it a second home, actually. And now, it’s going to be even greener.
Patient: Can you just tell me if I have VD? I’ve never noticed the lawn.
Doctor: I can’t wait to get to that. Would you like to make a generous contribution in the amount of $1,000?
Patient: Um, no. That’s my monthly insurance premium.
