If You Meet These Hyper-Specific Guidelines, You May Qualify For Student Loan Forgiveness
Published in
3 min readApr 8, 2024
- If you are a full-time staff member in the education component of a prekindergarten or child care program that is licensed or regulated by a state (for service that began on or after Aug. 14, 2008), you may be eligible for loan forgiveness.
- If you have ever, at any point in your life, been cast in a stage version of “Oklahoma,” as Gertie’s understudy, then you may be eligible for forgiveness.
- If you draw a photorealistic picture of a Frankenstein and mail it to the capitol building in Washington DC, we’ll show it to Dick Durbin. If he says something folksy to show his appreciation, you may be eligible for loan forgiveness. If it gives him nightmares, you have to wake up in the middle of the night to take care of him.
- If your first sexual awakening was seeing John Stamos sing Kokomo with the Beach Boys on Full House, you may be eligible for loan forgiveness.
- If you’re traveling southeast on the 74, and get off at a truckstop, near Kickapoo, there is a biker bar that offers a food-based eating challenge — ten eggs, a pound of bacon, a loaf of Texas toast, and a bunch of hash browns. If you can get it all down without barfing, we’ll give you a sweet t-shirt that says, “I may be eligible for loan forgiveness at Greasy…
