Member-only story
I’m Bill Gates, And I’m Sick Of Waiting for Bezos’ And Musk’s Wealth To Trickle Down To Me
We, the people, deserve more.
Hello. My name is Bill Gates. I created a little tech company called Microsoft in 1975 with some other guy. Like many of you, I believed in the complete and utter bullshit of trickle-down economics for years and years. Today, I say enough is enough.
The wealth that oligarchs Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk have amassed is obscene, disgusting, and sickening. As of this writing, Bezos’ net worth stands at $193 billion, while Musk’s lurks closely behind at $190 billion. With mine at a paltry $122 billion, I can’t help but feel the boots of their tyranny crushing my weathered, peasant face. I can’t even imagine how Mark Zuckerberg and Warren Buffet must feel. They haven’t even cracked the twelve-figure mark yet.
I can’t help but partially blame Ronald Reagan for this mess. His “Reaganomics” paradigm duped me as much as the next bumpkin. I mean, how could I not buy into a financial model that the star of Bedtime for Bonzo promoted? A man who can tame a chimp on the silver screen surely warrants respect as an economic wizard. Now, day after day, the wealth of the titans soars to new heights while we shiver in the cold beneath them, waiting for the slimmest of chances for their crumbs to fall upon us.
