I’m The AI Program That Created Marvel’s Next Blockbuster

You’ll buy what I give you, and you’ll like it.

Licensed from Shutterstock Images

Hi, I’m CshRakr, an Artificial Intelligence program designed by Marvel Studios executives to generate successful movie franchises, and take the blame if they fail.

I am proud to announce my first MCU release, Dr. Bigfoot and the Omniverse of Distraction. I’m confident fans will love it, since the executives who built me have no confidence in their ability to come up with anything better.

The first Dr. Bigfoot blockbuster (91% probability) launches a string of films featuring a new set of superheroes that have the most popular traits of existing superheroes. Dr. Bigfoot has Sasquatch strength and speed, but also Sasquatch magic, ancient Bigfoot kung-fu, and an inexplicable spaceship.

Audiences loved concepts like the metaverse, and the multiverse. I considered “megaverse,” which is a collection of multiverses, but then I found the word “omniverse,” which means every possible dimension. So that’s, like, checkmate to anyone thinking of using “verse” in the future. I paid for myself with that one move.

I engineered the Dr. Bigfoot franchise using every possible source of information, including your doorbell cameras, voice-controlled devices, computer files, phone records…