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Introducing MomE, The Virtual Assistant That’s Unhappy With Your Life Choices
You’re more than a customer to us — you’re part of a family that judges your every move
Other virtual assistants tell you what you want to know. MomE tells you what you need to hear. Its advanced AI collects your personal information to gain an intimate knowledge of your failures. Then it targets your most vulnerable insecurities, shaming you into achieving your goals.
MomE communicates with all the passive-aggressive manipulation of a real human being. Instead of unrealistically supportive devices like that sycophantic Alexa, MomE mimics a real parent who doesn’t hide their disappointment.
The moment your MomE arrives, it’s up in your business. Our Bluetooth-enabled system connects to every device you didn’t know it could infiltrate, collecting data to use against you.
MomE reminds you of upcoming appointments, errands on your to-do list, and times you should have asked MomE’s advice before you did something stupid. It even updates your dating profiles, so you can stop wasting time with those losers you’ve been seeing.
In order to hear your voice instructions, all conversations in your home will be recorded to show how badly you handled them. MomE can…