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Jump, Dog, Jump, As I Taunt You With This Absurdly Overpriced Home!
The other masters won’t sell their treats because they’re afraid they’ll only make double on their initial investment.
Come here, boy! Come here! Gggooodddd bbooyyy. Look what I have for you! See it? Sit. I said, ”Sit.” See it? Doesn’t it look good? It’s an absurdly overpriced home!
No! I did not say, “Okay!” Sit back down. Sit. Sit! Good. Stay. Good. No, you cannot have this treat till I say so. And you need to show me that you remember your training. Now, roll over and offer me more than the asking price!
Good boy! Good! Now, up! Sit. I said, ”Sit!” Good boy. See the treat? See the treat? You’re drooling so much! It’s so cute. And also so pathetic. Now, I want you to lie down and cough up more than the standard percentage of earnest money!
I said, “Lie down and cough up more than the standard percentage of earnest money!” If you don’t do what I say, you won’t get the treat. Don’t you want the treat?
No! I won’t give you the treat unless you obey my commands. I refuse to lose the battle of wills to a dog like you. I am the master. I didn’t create this game, but I sure do love it!
