Life Coach And Soup Expert Sydney Soup (AKA Mr. Soup) Answers Your Questions
If life gives you lemons, make lemon soup!
Dear Mr. Soup,
My boss keeps asking me to stay late to finish reports I can easily do in the morning. It’s really affecting my home life. I want to stand up to him, but don’t know how. How should I confront him?
— Jeff, 38
Jeff,
We forget the enormous pressure bosses are under. Many I know are too busy to even find time to have a flask of soup during the day, although there are plenty that could be easily drunk, like tomato or carrot.
Hunger only makes things worse. And it forces everyone in the office to deal with the consequences of your boss neglecting something as essential as soup.
Next time your boss asks you to stay late, have a nice, warm bowl of soup waiting for him. Any will do. Then, while he’s enjoying the soup, bring up your reservations about staying late. Only then will he listen.
He may turn it down and tell you to get back to work. If he does, next time you see him, offer soup again. But this time, try alphabet soup with the words “I QUIT” spelled out.
— Mr. Soup
Dear Mr. Soup,
My teenage daughter and I are struggling to get along these days. Sometimes I think she hates me. How can I reconnect with my daughter?
— Susan, 47
Susan,
It’s a well-known fact that teenagers love soup. It’s just a matter of giving them options.
Teenagers are at a stage where they’re still figuring things out. Should they have minestrone or carrot soup? Soups are so delicious and packed with nutrients, it’s too much for them to process.
Here’s what I propose. Throw your daughter a soup party and invite all her friends. Dish out any soup you can think of, such as leek and potato, chicken noodle, minestrone, and vegetable soup (to name a few), crank up the tunes, and enjoy the night.
This will not only bring you closer as mother and daughter, but it will also provide a delicious way to discuss soup with her friends, too. She’ll love you for it. And don’t forget, no teenage party is complete without crackers!
Hope it goes well.
— Mr. Soup
Dear Mr. Soup,
I am constantly teased at school for wearing glasses and a bow tie. Bullies won’t leave me alone. It’s a real problem. What should I do?
Thanks,
— Andy, 10
Andy,
Everyone is different. Some people prefer lentil soup, while others prefer chicken noodle.
Humans are no different. Our tastes may be different, but we all love soup.
So, here’s what I think you should do. Attempt to find out what soups they love. To save time, I’d recommend asking them directly. Then, to make peace, bring their favorite soups to school in bowls, hot and ready to eat, to share with your bullies. Make sure there are enough for everyone — and seconds!
If this doesn’t work, use the soups as weapons. But remember, only use them in self-defense (and make it look like an accident).
Good luck!
— Mr. Soup
Dear Mr. Soup,
I lost my business two months ago, and my life has been spiraling out of control. I can’t find the motivation to find a job or do anything. My wife is threatening me to leave with our two kids.
I’m desperate for help. Can you give me some non-soup related advice to get my life back on track?
— John, 36
John,
No. Go ask someone else for some “non-soup related” advice.
— Mr. Soup
