Men in Rooms Trying to Look Important: A Field Guide

This scientific record of natural occurrences is a collaboration between Rosamund Lannin and Taylor Klassman.

In today’s modern world of paper clips and female secretaries (sorry, executive assistants), you’ve probably had a meeting with a man. Maybe several men. Probably mostly men. Men like to do things during meetings that may seem inexplicable to the casual female observer. Never fear. We’ve been in a lot of meetings with men, and we’re here to help. For your perusal, a handy guide to the poses of men in the conference room wild.

Chapter 1: The Late Peek-Around

Did this start 10 minutes ago? What is a calendar

Chapter 2: The Stand and Point

Napoleon leads us into battle

Chapter 3: The Chin Scratch

My facial hair is an indication of my male prowess, let me show you

Chapter 4: The Piercing Stare

By God my eyes will burn the deliverables out of you

Chapter 5: The Intense Crouch

No idea what I’m saying but these tensed thighs mean my head is in the game

Chapter 6: The Nonsensical Whiteboarding

Oh god he’s drawing again

Chapter 7: The Chair Grab

Grip the back of that seat because we are really doing this you guys, we are really dying from hearing the word strategic three times in seven minutes

Chapter 8: The Stand and Point (Redux)

It’s very important this time, you can tell because I am standing and pointing again

Chapter 9: The Loom

Leaning into a dramatic pose that masks how I’m going to tune out any relevant discussion very, very soon then you can catch me up later, I trust Sarah is taking notes

Chapter 10: The Nod and Rephrase

Did he repeat what I said two minutes ago

Chapter 11: The Manspread

Do you mind if I take up three seats with my man legs while you get scrunched in the corner? Cool thanks, my big thoughts need a lot of room to breathe

Chapter 12: The Sleeve Roll

Want to see my arm hair? In case The Chin Scratch didn’t tip you off, I am a man

Chapter 13: The Thinker

Why do I make 20% more than my female colleagues in similar positions

Chapter 14: The Fake Time Check

Did Jamie in marketing just swipe left? The fuck

Chapter 15: The Early Exit

Even though I pontificated for half the meeting someone’s calling me about something more important and I have to go now good-bye

Bonus Sighting: The Ball Bounce

I’m not a regular boss I’m a cool boss, look I’m sitting on a ball

All photos copyright © 2017 Jenna Faye Photography. All rights reserved.