Interviewer: Hello. Welcome Mr. Munn.
My Son: Please. Call me “UNH!”
I: Unh?
MS: Yeah. UNH!
I: I’ll stick with Mr. Munn. (looks at drool covered resume) So I see here that you’ve listed Drawers as a skillset. Can you elaborate?
MS: Ah yes, I’ve become quite proficient at drawers. I can open and close them multiple times. And I’m also very good at pulling everything out of them one at a time, placing them on the ground in what starts neat and soon becomes a pile of chaos. I then take all of those same items and place them back into the drawer. I can repeat this process until I hear the sound of a snack bag being opened.
I: Excellent. And I see you’ve improved on your video watching skills.
MS: Oh yes. I love watching YouTube videos. But they must only be one of a select seven that I have seen and approved of. Any new videos upset me and I won’t put up with them. Any videos involving garbage trucks, semi trucks, or excavators are my prefernce. I will also enjoy the random farm animal sounds video, but the cows scare me.
I: What would you say is your biggest strength? And what is your biggest weakness?
MS: My biggest strength would be that I can pick up a toy tractor and carry it a good 10–15 feet. Now, you’re probably asking yourself “Why not just push the tractor? It’s got big wheels and moves very easily.” And that’s becasue I think outside the box.
I: (nods head)
MS: My biggest weakness would be my knowledge of bananas. I do enjoy eating them, however I’m confused as to why they need to be “opened.” I have attempted to just eat them right away and 1) I am yelled at, and 2) they do not taste as good. I get frustrated by having to wait for the banana to be opened, however that frustration quickly goes away once I’m a few bites in.
I: Excellent. One last question: do you have a stinky?
MS: (shakes head no)
I: Are you sure? Because it smells like you have a stinky.
MS: (vehemently shakes head no) Nooooo
I: I think you have a stinky.
MS: (runs out of room) Noooooo
