It’s been a few months since this all started. My sons, my two beautiful boys, were up late being the curious, rambunctious kids that they are. Jumping about, fondling my fine antiques and what-not. It had been a long day selling tridents over the phone and I needed some rest, and in a selfish effort to stifle their endless energy, I put into motion the events that would cost the world dearly. I used an old trick my Ba-Ba used on me when I was a recreant. I told them that if they made a wish at 11:11 it would come true, but only if they laid down in bed, shut their eyes and focused all of their energy on that wish.
Well, I’m sorry everyone. They did just that and now we are totally, inarguably, fucked. It came on slowly, as these things usually do. Sketchy videos from China. Weird news reports from India. Images and words from sources I couldn’t trust, and besides, it seemed like a distinctly “foreign” problem.
Well, just a week after “the wish,” the dragons did indeed arrive stateside, and it got ugly quick. They were swooping down into busy streets and grabbing groups of pedestrians to fly off with them, destroying cars with their fiery breath and really using our world like it was their toilet. I can’t stress this enough: all they do is shit. Everyone acts like it isn’t a big deal in the grand scheme of…
