Oh No, I Just Realized I’ll Never Be Able To See The Elephant’s Foot At Chernobyl!
The people who’ve seen it are dead now. Lucky sons of bitches!
Oh no! According to this article, the Elephant’s Foot at Chernobyl — a spot I’ve wanted to visit for a long time — is highly radioactive. Apparently it’s the exact site where the Chernobyl nuclear disaster happened, which means I’ll never see it in person. This sucks!
They say the only people who have seen it up close are dead now. Lucky sons of bitches!
Now I’ll never be able to try out different poses with it. I can’t take a picture of me putting my foot on it with my hands on my hips like I’ve conquered it, or sitting on it while reading the newspaper like it’s a toilet, or riding it like Napoleon in Jacques Louis-David painting “Napoleon Crossing The Alps,” or standing next to it in a janitor’s uniform with a mop bucket and a comically distressed look on my face! Truly TERRIBLE news!
Even the photographs researchers took of the elephant’s foot came out blurry, due to the radioactivity destroying the film. That means I can’t even purchase a clear image of what I’m missing to hang on my bedroom wall. Devastating, I know!
If I can’t see it or take pictures with it, then that means I really can’t drill…
