Passive-Aggressive Versions Of Classic Monsters
Dracula
Moments after he sinks his fangs into the side of your neck, the Count stops, pulls back, but then reassures you, “It’s not personal, it’s just someone I ate earlier.”
Frankenstein’s Monster
The Monster makes sure to emphasize you when he asks the doctor, “Why did you create me?” Later on, he tells the frenzied villagers, “Nice pitchforks.”
The Mummy
Mummy hangs out in the aisle at grocery stores watching people panic buy toilet paper, shaking his head going, “Leave some for the rest of us.”
The Invisible Man
This version of the Invisible Man isn’t physically abusive, he just clears his throat every time he’s in the room with someone when they pick their nose and eat it.
Bride of Frankenstein
“Aww, normal hair looks really cute on you.”
The Wolfman
Wolfy doesn’t howl, he mutters under his breath. He also transforms three days before the full moon because, as he tells his father, “It’s not like you ever remember when the full moon is, anyway.”
The Creature From the Black Lagoon
Turns out, the Creature wasn’t speechless. He was just giving you the silent treatment.
The Phantom of the Opera
Hanging around in the dark playing the organ but stopping the minute anyone walks into the room is pretty passive-aggressive already.
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