Press Release: Laura Is Buying A Sun Hat

New York, New York — For Immediate Release

EXCLUSIVE: Laura Indrop has decided this week that, after much consideration, she’ll be adding a new piece to her wardrobe: Laura will be buying a straw hat. Though her grandmother has protested that she “doesn’t have the ears to pull off a hat,” Laura will be striking out on her own in this endeavor. While she recovers from her online purchase, she will be relaxing on the couch in her home, surrounded by loved things. She requests privacy and would appreciate if her mother and the man at the bodega who always makes comments about her hair would please understand her needs during this time. She would like to be clear that it won’t “look like a cowboy hat.”

Laura has spent a lot of time making sure she’s a hat person by trying on the hats of friends at parties and glancing at her reflection in dirty windows (please see: new glasses frames (13th of August 2013) before contacting with any questions on this process).

This straw hat will be the first of its kind in her wardrobe. She is very excited to announce the addition of this hat and note that there is already some closet space set aside. No need to worry.

The aforementioned accessory will be arriving via FedEx from Madewell in 4 days. Please be courteous during the first few days of wear. Laura will be, and I quote, “extremely stressed out and will probably have to force myself to wear it out of the house even though I’ll think about taking it off right before I grab my keys.” Unquote. Please respect Laura’s privacy during this period and do not ask for selfies. She’ll be more than happy to make selfies a priority after the 4 day grace period.

Information on platform sandals will be released at a later date.

Crop tops have been canceled this week due to the unforeseen circumstances of Laura’s coworker bringing in donuts.