This Is A Dinner Party? I Thought You Said Donner Party
Sorry, I’m late. It’s a blizzard out there! I hope the fun hasn’t started without me. Wait, why am I the only one wearing a raccoon skin cap and linen breeches? Are we not all here for a brutal reenactment of frontier cannibalism? Oh, this is a dinner party? I thought you said Donner Party.
I’m so embarrassed. Abby, you planned a lovely evening of canapés and polite conversation and here I am thinking we were going to choose the weakest among us to kill and devour raw. Unless everyone is into my thing? No, you’re right, all that blood would ruin these ivory rugs. Also, we’d be willfully committing nature’s greatest taboo. That too.
Where are my manners? You must be Abby’s brother Gerald. How’s the pot roast? Beef is the closest meat in appearance to human flesh, but I’ve read that human flesh tastes most similar to pork. Yeah, only read about it in books… so far.
Caroline, would you believe this is the third time this has happened to me? It’s almost like I so desperately want to consume my fellow man, I hear Donner on purpose, hoping that one time I’ll be right.
Did you make these goat cheese pastry puffs, Samantha? I brought an appetizer too. Homemade hardtack. It’s a tough biscuit made of flour and water, but I season mine with a little salt. Sorry, I only brought two…
