What Your College Major Says About Your Life Post-Grad
Political Science: You have never been called for jury duty, and you’re starting to get kind of panicky about it.
Biology: You have three pet cacti and they are all named Esther.
Communications: You cannot reach climax until you reach Inbox Zero.
Geography: You went to school in Wisconsin but say “in the Chicago area.”
Physics: You have exclusively dated people with “outie” belly buttons, not on purpose (but kind of on purpose).
Music: You composed a song to remember the difference in spelling between “dessert” and “desert” and it plays on the radio now.
Urban Studies: You once made four transportation-related puns in a single sentence and it drove your bus driver wild.
Nutrition: You have “a quinoa guy.”
Creative Writing: You frequently cancel first dates due to dehydration.
Consumer Behavior: You order nachos with no cheese or other toppings and refuse to acknowledge any waiter who asks, “So…just chips?”
Anthropology: You never played Sweet or Sour in the car as a child, but you do now.
Classics: You’re working on a book of Mesopotamian dad jokes.
Marketing: Sometimes you fabricate news of an Old Navy sale just to get your partner out of the house.
Peace and Conflict Studies: You don’t have an opinion either way on whether Ross and Rachel were on a break.
Geology: You once swam into a rock and apologized to it; tears were heavily involved.
Media Studies: You listen to TV-recap podcasts of shows you’ve never watched.
Studio Art: You have used contact lens solution as the liquid to apply temporary tattoos.
Pharmacology: Your fun fact is that you can swallow five pills at a time, no water.
Physiology: You once grew your pinky nail out as long as it would grow, just to see.
Digital Humanities: You have an Instagram devoted to hamsters at water parks. It has been pretty lucrative, actually.
Folklore: You write unsolvable riddles in the comments section of your Seamless orders.
Chemistry: You have phobias of improv troupes, fitting room mirrors, and sonnets.
Latin: You teach goat yoga now.