You’re Invited To Our Anti-Consumerist Holiday Party!
You’re the gift, except we’re not doing gifts.
Hey there! I just wanted to follow up on David’s email to make sure we’re clear: when we said no gifts for our holiday party this year, we truly meant it. Like, no gifts. None.
Don’t bring a ‘pinot for the table,’ or some homemade granola that you ‘just whipped up this afternoon,’ or a glass-blown ornament for the tree. We don’t have any ornaments yet because the box got lost in the move, but we don’t need any. We’re leaning into the minimalist look.
We’re focusing on the holiday spirit removed from consumerist culture. We’d like to dwell on the smell of fresh pine, the crackles of green bean casserole in the oven, and the sweet conversation chiming through our dining room. It’s sparsely furnished right now from our move and we’re on the hunt for some classy, mid century decor — but don’t take that as a hint.
To make sure I’m not being misunderstood, if you’re the kind of person for whom gift-giving is a top love language (I see you Alma), I’m talking to you: no gifts.
Giving gifts is my top love language, too, followed by quality time. I’m leaning into quality time this year. You are the gift. But since we aren’t doing gifts, you are a beloved collection of atoms that I feel very fond of.
Remember how Rachel took that trip to Costa Rica last year? I’ve always wanted to go zip-lining. But please don’t misinterpret this as me saying I’d like that as a gift, because like we’ve clearly said, no gifts. You’re misinterpreting my conversation starter as a passive-aggressive wish list, but that’s not what this is. I want us all to get past buying things in place of meaningful time together.
Speaking of meaningful time together, Georgia, I loved how you gifted that underground dining experience to Claire and Marco. And getting Maria a membership to the botanical garden? Genius. I hear they have a new succulent garden on display for the rest of the year. Hoping to catch it soon if I can remember to get tickets.
But why are you thinking about gifts??! Stop! Please, NO GIFTS. Like, not that cool new candle that goes out on its own so you don’t have to worry about burning the house down if you forget to blow it out. Or a subscription to The New Yorker so I can read Hannah Goldfield’s food reviews every week (Just an idea that’s been percolating, like my Italian coffee maker that coincidentally just broke. I keep meaning to replace it. But not a gift idea. They are ideas for what not to gift me, ‘cuz we explicitly said NO. GIFTS).
No cologne from France, Maya. I love your jasmine sandalwood blend but I’m sure I’ll remember to pick some up in the future. No Lulu Lemon leggings (I’m a size small). No improv class so I can finally get over my stage fright. Whatever you do, don’t even think about getting us a double hammock for our new backyard. That would be ridiculous, why would you even think of it?
Sure, I’ve shared those cute glass-blown solar lights on my IG Stories at least 13 times, but don’t think of buying them for me. Geez. Can we stop purchasing things as a replacement for love? Your company and spirit are gifts enough. More than enough. Except they aren’t gifts because we’re not doing gifts. Stop letting the capitalist machine ensnare you. I have an article all about it that I would share with you except I’ve reached The New York Times free article limit, so it’ll have to wait until next month. One day I’ll renew my subscription.
By the way, don’t you love a good spirit? My favorite is aged bourbon or scotch. I also hear there’s this new Pacific Northwest woman-owned gin distillery that’s rad.
Seriously, though, why are you obsessing about gifts like this? It’s like you’re focusing on my wish list when I’m telling you I’m trying to escape consumerist culture.
Anywho, this got long. Sorry to fill up your inbox with one more email, I know it gets wild this time of year. We’ll see you in December! It’s a gift to connect with you. Except not a gift because we aren’t doing gifts this year, remember?
