Looks like I picked the wrong week to quit sniffing glue.
I am a white man, and this is a list of my struggles. Thank you.
I am a white man, and this is a list of my struggles. Thank you.
Constantly being mistaken for Paul Rudd and having to turn down movie roles.Feeling excluded from stories of oppression. Well, not excluded precisely, just not being on the side I’d prefer. ¶ Getting sunburned just really quite a lot, unless I wear sunscreen. ¶ Taking the time to learn the definition of “micro-aggression” and then finding out it doesn’t apply to me. ¶ Finding out that “micro-aggression” does in fact apply to me, but not in the way I’d prefer. ¶ Explaining what micro-aggressions are to every woman I encounter.Mike OttumMar 30
Someone on This Train Farted
Someone on This Train Farted
Don’t look at me.Someone on this train farted ¶ Don’t look at me. ¶ It wasn’t just a random little fart that happened to slip out, either. This was a full-blown, paint-stripping fart o’fire. The kind of fart that foreshadows bowel actions yet to come. The kind of fart that makes nearby toilets wish they were not. The kind of fart that could break up the Beatles. ¶ I scanned the car for suspects in my vicinity. Business man wearing earbuds and reading the Wall Street Journal.Tony AfterwitMar 10
My CEO gave me a coupon for this sandwich place: A Poem
My CEO gave me a coupon for this sandwich place: A Poem
I was gonna order sushi, and he was likeYou should order from here, their sandwiches are amazing ¶ And slid a coupon for 25% off across my desk. ¶ I searched the restaurant name on Seamless ¶ It wasn’t there, ¶ so I visited their website. ¶ “Click here to order online,” it said ¶ So I clicked ¶ but it took me to the App Store instead. ¶ Of course, ¶ I had to download their special app to make my lunch happen. ¶ Ten minutes later ¶ I am starving ¶ I have the app (it crashed twice), I confirmed my email, I am putting…Startup Life SatireJan 27
Slackjaw SXSSW Wrap-up
Slackjaw SXSSW Wrap-up
Hello semi-interested Slackjaw subscribers. Lots of action in our world recently, so let’s get right to it.SXSSW ¶ We just convened our first-annual board meeting at SXSSW Inactive, and it was arguably a huge success. ¶ Yes, while SXSW was happening in Austin, a soon-to-be-equally dynamic convergence was happening at South By South-South-West in Lubbock, TX. ¶ Not everyone gets that invite to Austin. So say hello to SXSSW Inactive, the next wave of all the stuff you go to Austin for, but even more more X.Greg GueldnerMar 21
Dear Mr. Hannula,
As president of the Listicle Writers of America, a trade organization dedicated to the promotion and advancement of blogging’s best loved…art form, I’m pleased to inform you of your acceptance into our organization based upon the submission of your article, “Signs of the Apocalypse.” You will receive all of the following benefits if you choose to join us by filling out the attached membership card and depositing 25 bitcoins in our Nigerian bank account. ¶ Access to the “library of listicles” behind the paywall at our “under construction” wix website.
GutbloomMar 3
Sandy Perlmutter, once again, you are a good egg.
I have a confession to make. My use of “slap bracelets” for comic effect… and let’s be clear — it’s obvious comic gold… is stolen from none…By mentioning the slap bracelets you have given me an opportunity to right a creative wrong that I was unsure how to address. ¶ I have a confession to make. My use of “slap bracelets” for comic effect… and let’s be clear — it’s obvious comic gold… is stolen from none other than Morgan Rock Loehr. You can see his original use of it here: ¶ I’m just lucky you gave me the chance to come clean before the inevitable twitter fight over stolen material.GutbloomJan 29