2021 New Year’s Resolutions: Run, Meditate, Learn to Ride a Horse??
My current self-nurturing practice includes lying in my bed and thinking about self-nurturing activities.
My New Year’s Resolution for 2021 is to engage in self-nurturing activities. My current self-nurturing practice includes lying in my bed and thinking about self-nurturing activities, such as: meditating, going for a run, reading a critically-acclaimed book, learning origami, taking up a 30-day yoga challenge, becoming a vegetarian, or learning to ride a horse.
I tell the writers I work with that thinking about writing and writing are not the same thing. Writing is what you do when you write. Thinking about writing is what you do when you do nothing, but feel like you did something because you thought about it. I am beginning to see that, for me, self-nurturing operates the same way.
I get a good feeling when I think about self-nurturing — even when I don’t actually do it. It’s the “thinking-about-stuff placebo effect.” It is the “as-if-I-did-something” high. Sadly, it is not real. It’s just another form of resistance. In 2021, I resolve not to fall victim to this sneaky, phony, as-if feeling. I am going to think less and engage more! To that end, I made a list of self-nurturing activities for 2021 that may, possibly, interest me:
3. Learn to ride a horse
That’s all I could come up with. So let’s examine the possibilities.
I started running during the pandemic. As much as I hate to admit it, I love running. I hate that I love running since I am a physically lazy person by nature. But somehow when I run, I feel good. And it’s not just during the run. The good feeling lasts afterwards. So this is a self-nurturing activity that I resolve to continue in 2021. I will run every week. I am not committing to every day. I am committing to every week and we will see how it goes. But I vow to refrain from lying in my bed and thinking about running.
Well, this is a weird one because every time I meditate, I love it. I feel calm and at peace and restored. And yet, I resist meditating because I don’t like liking it. It’s very similar to running. I have a friend who is into Transcendental Meditation and is always encouraging me to check it out. She has even sent me websites and teacher names. In 2021, researching TM is on the list. I am going to commit to learning about it and following up with her suggestions. Baby steps!
#3. Horseback riding
I have no idea where this came from. I am not one of those Instagram horsey-girls who wears horse charms and has pictures of horses in her house. I suspect this activity might be inspired by binge-watching Bridgertons and Peaky Blinders and now, The Crown. It’s something I can do during the pandemic and there are stables not far from my house and I could try one lesson and see if I like it or if I fall off the horse. I know I won’t be galloping across the English countryside anytime soon, but still…It seems like it could be nurturing so why not give it a try? Plus, I love wearing boots.
My Self-Nurturing List for 2021 may seem small and measly to some. Maybe I should be more ambitious? Maybe my piddly attempt at running and researching mediation centers and taking one horseback riding lesson is unimpressive. Maybe I should throw myself into a total self-nurturing transformation? But I won’t. When I throw myself into something, I have a tendency to yank myself out of it soon after.
In 2021, I am going for slow and steady.
I have a friend who regularly goes on weeklong mindfulness and meditation retreats. As a self-nurturing resister, that is too big a step for me. Plus, my kids would complain. So would my husband. But maybe that’s why it is called, S-E-L-F -nurturing. Let the troops complain but nurture yourself!
I will add, “Go on Retreat” to my 2022 Self-Nurturing List. For now, I am going to look for the email from my friend with the Transcendental Meditation information. Then I have to call the stables. Tally-ho and Happy New Year!