exit ramp
the old girl is shifting rapidly into elderly gear. frail back end. an awkward, embarrassing struggle to leap onto bed or couch. long periods of rest under the radiator. in pain when i pet her. kitty dementia that makes her hard of hearing and causing her meows to be screams. a tiny lion in pain. no more galloping down the hallway. she’s 20. i’ve been telling friends for years that she’s 19, so i bumped it up to 20. that’s a lot of human years. her fur’s still soft and kept clean, but she eats next to nothing and licks her hole more than usual. i took her to the vet 7 months ago with these symptoms. they gave her an antibiotic shot and an appetite stimulant (liquid weed?). in 2 days she was a teenager, her full awesome self. but this week, she hit the wall all over again. i took her back up. got the shot. gave her the stimulant as a pill which, as predicted, made her foam at the mouth like an epileptic. spewed white froth all over her loathsome kitty suitcase. she hated it and continued to eat nothing at all. she’s weak and slow. the meekest of purrs. my poor girl. somehow, tradition still applies. when I’m in bed she struggles up onto my chest, twists and turns and settles down to sleep. makes me hope she’s got many months of life ahead. we pass out. around 3 am there’s an explosion. a burst of light. a miniature fireball arcing in front of my desk as i rub my eyes awake. what the fuck was that!? a stench of electric burn in the air. i crack open the window and then i see it. sofi had pissed on the nest of electric chords and made a miniature yellow pond under and around the power strip. she could have been electrocuted! the reverse zing that happens when you try to light a fart and it goes ‘back up’. what i think happened was that after she cut loose it took time to seep into the strip, before it hit the explosive jackpot. thank god there wasn’t a fire. this girl is going out with a bang.
This is an excerpt from my book, The Paragraphs — Cutlass Press
About The Paragraphs and how to order
Or here
