“Wannabe” (1999)

Smock tells the story of one artist’s work reflecting the early years of a certain Britpop sensation.

Smock Staff
Smock Review
2 min readJan 15, 2019

--

Wannabe, 1999.

The artist moved to London, England in late 1995, originally with the intention of visiting her dear friend Hugh Grant. Hugh proved to be too demanding with constant requests to be bathed in Heinz baked beans and engaged in 24-hour marathon ukulele playing sessions.

As fate would have it, the artist was taking tea to escape the British actor in “Ye Olde English Tea Shoppe,” when a talent agent asked if she would be interested in becoming a member of a newly formed girl band called, The Spice Girls.

Thus, the original line up of Chloe (Ennui Spice), Linnea (Spacey Spice), Zazza (Vegetarian Spice), Isabel (Cool Spice), Shannon (Posh Spice) met in a recording studio in February 1996 to record Wannabe, a catchy yet highly annoying ditty with the nonsensical zigga zig ah refrain.

Internal battles soon became rife, mainly caused by Vegetarian Spice’s addiction to broccoli resulting in a wide-eyed stare; Posh and Cool demanding waffles and ice cream at all times; and the radically different political ideologies of Spacey and the artist. The line up split in late 1997.

A new set of girls was brought in, and the rest is history.

Disenchanted with the pop scene, the artist drew the above work to wide acclaim. The painting was purchased by Victoria Beckham in April 2004 for $7m. Meanwhile, Vegetarian Spice’s whereabouts remain mysterious, though she was spotted in 2012 asleep in a supermarket in Bangkok, Thailand lying in the green grocery section.

At Smock Review, we write fictitious, outrageous and entertaining reviews of your art — or your kid’s art. You can kind of think of it like “The Onion” but for art critiques. Want to get reviewed? Find out how to submit your work here!

--

--