Tips For Choosing The Perfect Valentine’s Day Gift
Published in
1 min readFeb 1, 2019
- Help them remember a shared experience with a t-shirt commemorating that time you went to that place and did that thing that they will never wear but will continually have to debate throwing out every so many years.
- Avoid fitness items by just telling them they’re disgusting.
- A DNA test can be fun and what’s more exciting than finding out who you are related to because digging into the dark corners of your secretive family’s past can only lead to good news, right?
- Don’t get them a gift you also want because you are definitely going to end up on trial for their murder. Trust me. Trust me. Hey! Trust me.
- Avoid cliches like chocolate, flowers, or perfume and try thinking outside the box for a goddamn change. I’m looking at you, Kyle, you pathetic piece of shit, are you just ‘copy/pasting’ your life from internet articles and Instagram stories? Jesus man, just give up.